Who is the funniest Footballer?
When it comes to football, it’s easy to get carried away by the tactical genius, mesmerizing footwork, and just flat-out athletic moments of brilliance. However, there’s another often underrated side to the beautiful game: the personalities.
And some of those personalities? Well, they’re flat-out hilarious.
Behind the steely focus of game day, many footballers are comedians in disguise, often serving up some of the funniest moments both on and off the field. From their cheeky antics and razor-sharp wit to just full-on bafflingly bizarre behaviour, these players have left us laughing as hard as they’ve left defenders reeling.
Yes, football may be a serious sport, but for these guys, humour is part of the game plan.
In this piece today, we will be looking at some top players with a great sense of humour and facetious characters both on and off-field pitch.
First Published on Mar 21 2020, updated Sept 26 2024
Here Are 5 Of The Funniest Footballers
5. Mario Balotelli (Italy)
Mario is one player who tends to be isolated because of his on-field characters and crazy displays. But he’s a funny player with some of his behaviours on and off the field.
On two different occasions, the Italian scored and brought out his iPhone to record videos with his teammates. And talking of controversy, there is none better than Mario Balotelli. His funny quotes have brought about controversy with the latest one being that he claimed to be the best player after Lionel Messi.
The “child-like” Balotelli claiming he doesn’t know who Wilshere is: “No, I don’t know him, but next time I play Arsenal, I will keep a close eye on him,” and “Perhaps I can show him my Golden Boy trophy and remind him that I won it.”
Balotelli and his “not so special quote”: “Mourinho is the best coach in the world, but as a man, he still needs to learn manners and respect”
I’m not a bad guy but I’m shy. Interviews are hard”
I don’t celebrate because I’m only doing my job. when a postman delivers the letter, does he celebrate?
There’s only one that is a little stronger than me: Messi. All others are behind me.
When someone calls me ugly, I go up to them, smile tenderly, and hug them because I know life ain’t easy when you have a seeing disability.
They Didn’t get angry because I took my shirt off and got booked, they saw my physique and got jealous.
I am different- if you can find another like me, then I will buy you dinner!
I’m not a bad guy but I’m shy. Interviews are hard”
Balotelli’s brand of humour is both unpredictable and raw, just like his style of play. You never know what you are going to get with Mario, but whatever it is, it is bound to be entertaining.
4. George Best (Northern Ireland)
George Best was football’s original superstar known just as much for his antics off the pitch as his breathtaking skills on it. While most footballers these days are media-trained to the point of robotic blandness, George was refreshingly honest, self-deprecating, and downright funny.
Best’s life was a heady cocktail of brilliance, booze, and bravado, but his humour was always there to soften the edges of his self-destructive habits.
During the days George was one witty player. He provided some pretty funny quotes for football. Here are some of them:
“I spent a lot of money on booze, birds, and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.”
“I used to go missing a lot: Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World.”
“If I’d been born ugly, you’d never have heard of Pele.”
People say I slept with seven miss worlds, I didn’t. it was only four, I didn’t turn up for the other three.
I might go to Alcoholics Anonymous, but I think it would be difficult for me to remain anonymous
Best was that type of player who seemed to know the absurdity of it all-the fame that came through football. While the modern game at times can be a little too serious, the laid-back humor of Best is a reminder that, ultimately, it’s just a game.
READ ALSO: Funny: Referee Gives Linesman Red Card For Vomiting On The Touchline
3. Romario (Brazil)
Romário was an entertainer on and off the pitch, with quick wit that was often as brazen as his humor was, never afraid to say something as bold as he was on the pitch or as audacious as his lifestyle off the pitch.
One of his hilarious quotes was where he boasted to be a better player than Diego Maradona and while you put together his unique display on the field of play and his personality off the field, you’ve gotten a funny player in Romario. We have some of his quoted below:
“There’s nothing I like more than football …except for sex.”
“The goalscorer always deserves some credit but not this time. The way I hit that, even my mother would have saved it.”
“I weigh 72kg, so what? Elephants are fat but when there’s a fire in the forest, no one beats them.”
Perhaps his most mythical moment arrived when he struck a deal with his Barcelona manager, Johan Cruyff. Romário was allowed to take two days off to party in Rio if he scored two goals in a match. In a 5-0 win against Real Madrid, he netted a hat-trick and immediately after the game, told Cruyff: “My plane is leaving in an hour.”
As cheeky as Romário’s playing style was his humour. He had the skill to back up his arrogance, but it was through the ability to laugh at both himself and others that he truly became such a lovable figure in football.
2. Zlatan Ibrahimović (Sweden)
This list would be incomplete if the former Manchester United striker is found wanting. Zlatan has been tagged as “Lord of Savage” by fans of the round leather game due to his incredibly outrageous comments and jibes he throws constantly to some of his colleagues.
You can’t throw a discussion on funny footballers without mentioning him. The man is a walking soundbite, never afraid to say exactly what’s on his mind, often with a level of self-assurance bordering on parody.
What makes Zlatan funny isn’t the fact that he is so arrogant but the fact that he knows he is arrogant and leans into it with every fibre in his body.
He has a ready-made response to every question and criticism as well.
Below are some of his quotes:
“What [John] Carew does with a football, I can do with an orange.” This is in response to Carew’s suggestions that Ibrahimovic’s flicks and tricks were “pointless.”
A female reporter joked that Zlatan was gay due to a photo of him hugging Pique. ‘
He replied: Come to my house and you see if I’m gay and bring your sister.
After being asked by a reporter why there were scars on his face: Well, I don’t know.. You’ll have to ask your wife about that.
On life at Barcelona: The Barca players were like schoolboys, following the coach blindly, whereas I was used to asking “why should we”
READ ALSO: Top 15 Funniest Names In Football As At 2018
“When you buy me, you are buying a Ferrari. If you drive a Ferrari you put premium petrol in the tank, you hit the motorway and you step on the gas. Guardiola filled up with diesel and took a spin in the countryside. He should have bought a Fiat.” – Don’t waste Zlatan.
If anything, the children of Paris should be giving me even more money for having the privilege of being in the same city as my incredible quality. And so should David Beckham. Call it a Zlaritable donation.
“When I was in my prime (28 years), I was playing in a European top club, at 28, you shouldn’t be scoring hat-tricks in MLS and be happy you’re doing well..“. In response to an interviewer who compared him to Carlos Vela in the MLS.
Nothing beats Zlatan’s confidence, and his wit is as sharp as his goal-scoring ability. Whenever he is on or off the pitch cameras are always looking for him, and in most cases, he is the one who keeps others laughing.
1. Peter Crouch (England)
Peter is the funniest footballer in the world and arguably the undisputed king of social media – his tweets are always hilarious. Also, And not only on social media, It only took a response of one line from Peter Crouch to be considered one of the funniest men in football.
Crouch’s response when asked a question was epic and savagery which made him be rated amongst funny footballers.
Crouch was asked: “What would you be if you weren’t a footballer?” The then Spurs striker answered: “A virgin!“.
On Chelsea opting to sign Olivier Giroud instead of himself:
“I’d go as far as to say they got themselves the division’s second best-looking target man.”
“I wouldn’t want to get my pigeon chest out in front of anyone. I don’t think the world needs it. I’d probably get a yellow card anyway.”
“I always wanted to be a footballer. Of course, I did. Not a basketball player, as I get asked on a daily basis, or a roofer who doesn’t need to use a ladder or a zookeeper who can talk to the giraffes face-to-face.”
“I don’t have any tattoos, but that’s mainly because none of my limbs are wide enough to support a visible image.”
I knew there were problems with decision-making at FIFA when I didn’t make the Ballon d’Or shortlist
Another funny incident from Peter was when he took to Twitter to tweet a picture of himself and Giraffes and added a caption that writes, “Summer for me is about time with family“
The beauty of Crouch’s humour is that it does come across. A player who never took himself too seriously, despite having had a career which most players would dream of. He has had a penchant for entertaining-whether scoring those headed goals or making people laugh off the field.
